How to Change Child’s Negative Behavior

How to Change Child's Negative Behavior

Children have a whole slew of negative behaviors that they try out over the years. By the time they’re 3 and 4 years old, they’ve run the gamut of crying, shouting, hitting and tattling. You might wonder where these little rage machines came from, and many parents blame themselves, thinking if they had only been better, more supportive parents, their children would be content. This is not so.

Rare is the child that skips testing these behaviors to see if any of them work. The burden of parenting is slowly and painstakingly showing your children that those methods don’t work, then proving to them that life is better when they cease to use the negative techniques altogether.

Distract

When your child is feeling negatively toward another person or even an object, her first reaction will be to lash out. It’s easy for a child to get stuck on the feeling of release that gives her. Combined with her repetitive nature at this point in her life, she could float on this negativity kick for hours. If you fight her on it, tit for tat, she’ll get more stubborn and set in her thinking. Using distraction tools might seem like you’re simply avoiding the problem, but you’re not. Giving your child something else, something happier, to think about will reframe her thoughts and emotions at that moment.

Then later, you can broach the topic on your terms, when you’re both on neutral ground. For instance, if your child is shouting about wanting to wear a different shirt, but you don’t have another shirt because you’re at the library, take her to another section for a new environment, and pick out a few colorful books from the shelves. Start talking to her about these books in a cheerful tone, to get her interested in the pictures. She may even ask you to read one.

Redirect

Redirecting is more involved than distraction in that it uses the original negativity to piggy-back from. The parent takes the negative thoughts and reactions and spins the situation so that there is no room for a tantrum or grudge. Say your child is throwing a tantrum because he wants to open a DVD by himself but doesn’t have the dexterity to do it. Tell him that you understand how frustrating that is, then get your own DVD from the shelf. Fumble with it for a moment to get his interest. Then, as he watches you, very slowly and deliberately open the DVD so that he sees your hand movements. Then have him try again.

By inserting yourself into his situation in a non-combative way, he’ll be less likely to fight your help. You’ve placed yourself on the same team. Direct your child to a solution to his problem without giving in to his moods. The more you minimize the damage, the more easily he’ll see that his reactions are overblown.

Use Positivity
        

Give your children the power of language to combat their instinctive behavior. If your kids think in negative terms — like stupid, jerk, unfair and hate — they’re going to have a harder time seeing each situation as it actually is, rather than an elaborate ploy against them. Show your children other ways to label their problems. You can use laughter, labeling something that would have otherwise been negative as silly or funny. For instance, if you have a child who doesn’t quite grasp that she doesn’t have control over other people and their decisions, you can explain the situation simply, so that neither party is wrong.

Children are illogical little things. If you put them on the defensive by telling them they’re doing something wrong, you’ll never get them to calm down. If one child will only color in blue, and your kid is convinced he should color in purple, say, “Isn’t it funny how Mark always wants the blue crayon? He’s so silly.” Over time, your child will come to accept that she doesn’t have control over every little detail and that it’s better to just let some things go.

Give Context
        

The most adult way to handle negative behavior, particularly when it is aimed at someone else, is to give the situation context for your little one. Preschoolers have trouble seeing the world as anything outside of themselves. To them, the way they feel is the way everyone feels and they have every right to behave in the manner they do. They assume everyone would do the same; they assume everyone is exactly as they are, and therefore should seamlessly understand their point of view. With just a bit of prodding from you, however, they will be able to associate their side of the issue with that of their perceived foe.

Like if a child is spinning around in a circle and hits your kid, she may try to retaliate, and you need to calmly interject. Tell her that violence is never right, and show her that the other child didn’t mean to swat her. Give the other side of the story and allow your child to understand the full circle.

ARTICLES

How to PrepareProtein Dip Recipe for Toddlers Skip As the mom of a toddler or preschooler, you are probably well acquainted with the magic of dipping. There's just something about dunking her meal that...
How To Share Physical Development of the 3 Year Old Skip The world through your 3-year-old’s eyes can be an exciting and enthralling place. He’s not a helpless baby anymore and he’s probably capable of perfo...
How to Arrange Sunday Activities for Toddlers in California San Rafael, California, is in the San Francisco Bay Area and is home to nearly 60,000 residents. Families living in San Rafael or the surrounding area...
Xilinx Customer Service Support Phone Number Are you looking for Xilinx customer service support phone number & Customer Email Support Assistance like Telephone Number  ,Mobile Number ,Toll f...
How to Make Streaming Movies From a Server to an iPad The iTunes App Store features a number of apps you can use to stream movies from a remote server to your iPad. These apps rely on computer software th...
Is Marine Stereo Systems Compatible With iPods ? Though marine-grade stereos are designed to protect the equipment from direct contact with the elements, many offer the same options available in stan...
KPMG 24/7 Customer Care Numbers Welcome to Sevenbucket.com It is the source of customers’ trust and .sharing reliable information about Company’s around the world. We provide all Com...
How to use Setting up a Wireless Network at Home | Tech Channel Skip The center of your home wireless network is the wireless router, which you locate near your incoming Internet connection. Use an Ethernet cable to con...
How life insurance is it really worth it for life How To Believe Life Insurance Companies? Many people are aware that life insurance companies may or may not cover a person due to a terminal illness. ...
BAE Systems Customer Support Numbers Welcome to Sevenbucket.com It is the source of customers’ trust and .sharing reliable information about Company’s around the world. We provide all Com...
How Parents Prepare Passover foods for Toddlers The Passover meal is a celebratory dinner full of rich symbolism and history, and is designed to engage the entire family. Prayers are sung, the story...
How To Share The Benefits of SSL For Newsgroups Connecting to newsgroups involves connecting to a server sharing the posts of that newsgroup. The Secure Sockets Layer protocol, typically used by fin...
How Toddlers Learn About Wind Turbine From Science Compared to other forms of energy generation, wind power suffers from several challenges and disadvantages. Wind farms must often be constructed in re...
How to Find the Strategies Help to Your Toddlers Sleep Common sleep battles among toddlers have prompted the popularity of the "children's" book, "Go the F*** to Sleep." Every parent knows what it's like t...
Strategic Pension Service LLC: Customer Service & Support Number Are you looking for Strategic Pension Service LLC Customer support service number & Email Support, We are here to help, enhance, and impressive th...
How to Share Pounding Activities for Children Pounding activities promote development of little minds and bodies alike, as young children discover how to use large and small muscle groups and eye-...
Top Hotels Customer Enquirer Number in Australia Hi Cricket Lovers, I think everybody have a World Cup Cricket Fever. Obviously U have a Chance to visit Australia to watch all matches .Are you lookin...
A-1 Burbank Movers: Customer Service & Support Number Are you looking for A-1 Burbank Movers  Customer support service number & Email Support, We are here to help, enhance, and impressive the customer...
How to Prevent Health Problems of Toddlers You probably thought you wouldn’t have to talk to your daughter about feeling not-so-fresh until at least puberty, but think again. Feminine hygiene i...
Is It Possible to Control a Servo With an RFID? You can use radio frequency identification technology (RFID) technology to control a servomechanism and move a load in response to a signal. This is s...
Time Warner Cable 24/7 Customer Toll Free Numbers Are you looking for  Customer Care Support& Customer Support Technical Assistance & Customer Email Support Assistance like Telephone Number  ,...
How to Make Donuts Recipe for Kids The goal for any kids’ recipe is to end up with a tasty food that is easy to make. Instead of heading to the bakery whenever your tot gets a hankering...
How to Solve Toddlers Cry It Out Issues Ever since the early 1980s, when a pediatrician named Richard Ferber released a book that encouraged parents to let their babies cry at night, parents...
How to Buy Best Cameras for Facebook Twitter Timeline Photo sharing has become an integral part of the social networking sites Facebook and Twitter. Although we describe what's on our minds and what's hap...
How To Connect Websites to Internet Explorer To keep up with the growing and evolving Web, browsers regularly receive updates and new versions designed to work better with newer standards of Web ...

Author: vijayanand